How to Be Attractive To Women

In a follow up to my popular email/blog post (and video) on dating Asian girls, this is what I've personally experienced dealing with women and how to become attractive to them.

1) Be Tall – Women want to look up to a man, literally and figuratively.

2) Be Rich/Successful/Ambitious – This type of man is equivalent to a beautiful woman. Have you ever seen a big chunky girl riding shotgun in a Lamborghini?

3) Be Handsome, Cool or Intimidating – You need a look. Sure, you will find some cognitively inept men bewilderingly proclaim “Looks don't matter” or the total opposite that it's only looks. We'll call those guys virgins. Looks matter. Be handsome, if you can't be handsome then be cool looking (like an artist or musician), if you're can't pull that off then be intimidating (big strong bald guy with tattoos archetype) as girls feel safe with this sort of man.

4) Be Jacked at Best, Fit at a Minimum – This applies even more if you're under 6ft. I have experience the difference of being a skinny fat guy at 163lbs and a fit, strong 175lbs man. When I'm in shape and women touch my arms and check my butt out, the first thing they say, with huge eyes, is “wow!”

5) Be Highly Confident – Women find being overly confident attractive, even if you're just being silly. "Oh well, I guess I have to make a ton of money and do whatever I want, tough to be me." They eat it up.

6) Do Not Defer to Her – Women want to feel safe with you, and they feel safe when you're a competent and playful leader. Not Mr. Super Serious, Not Mr. Jackass who doesn't know anything. You lead, she defers to you.

7) Be Sarcastically Funny but Not Self-Deprecating – Women absolutely love when you're playful, but they do not love when you make fun of yourself. She wants to look up to you so don't tear yourself down, even in a joking manner.

8) Do Not Be Needy – Enough said, we all know this.

9) Don't be a Typical Nice Guy – "Nice guy" now means harmless guy who's not capable and people use and abuse. Girls like nice men, not weak men.

10) Be Pre-occupied with Your Own World – Make her a part of your world. Whatever you are excited about she will genuinely become excited about as well. Do not become a part of her world – do not stay at home and watch Tiktok shorts and TV shows about gay dancers or whatever dumb shit that's popular right now. Do your own thing and make sure it is a priority for you.

11) Don't be Too Available – I am not saying play some teenager texting game. I am saying genuinely be too busy to reply to her messages and even see her sometimes. Remember, you don't need to reply back ASAP. She can wait and will be more attracted to you if you're legit busy.

12) Have Excellent Style – In combination with your physicality and overall look, know how to put yourself together that works for you. I'm telling you, when you look like the man, you're treated like the man.

13) Make Decisions – Lead, make decisions. Don't play the "well what do you want to do" game.

14) Be Aggressive in Bed – Women do not like timidity, especially in the bedroom. Be a Gentleman in public, be a caveman in private. This is also true for women: Be a lady in public and a whore in private. Here is an extra tip: Women absolutely love to be objectified. But only by winners.

15) Enforce Boundaries – Have your personal red lines that are non-negotiable. Do not allow a woman to walk all over you, put her in her place and maintain your bearings (or frame as it's called, I say bearings because I was in the military). I'm not saying lose it and act crazy, just enforce your boundaries in a stern manner. They'll respect you more for this.

16) Do not take advice from women about how to win a woman's heart – Women assume attraction, so they always tell you what they like and want from the top 10% of men they're already attracted to. Not what you need to do to become attractive in the first place. It's also advice for long term, not short term. On top of that, women gas each other up too if you haven't noticed “no, you aren't fat! You should eat more! Your haircut doesn't make you look like a boy, it's super cute!!!"

17) Give Up Porn – Women have TikTok brain, men get their souls stolen from porn. Don't partake.

18) Don't Be Scared to Say Hi – Picking up women is simply a numbers game. If you see an attractive girl on the street, and she gives you some eye contact and other basic approach signals, go ahead and say something to her.

Pick 5-7 of the above traits and you will do fine with women. 

The real deal truth is that you need to concentrate on your career (money), your physique and health, take care of yourself and be the master of your own world and invite her in. Last, you need to hold yourself to a masculine standard.

No, you don't need to be in touch with you “feminine side”. If you worship the ground she walks on, she will not respect you. If you don't worship the ground she walks on, she will follow your lead and everybody's happy.

Chemistry of Attraction: Dating and Relationships

Real and raw dating advice. Learn how to become a person who has choice in dating. Don't read if you're easily offended.