Personal Growth

The Peak of a Man is 38

I'm 42. I've always said it's 28-38 for a man's prime. I get so much push back on this. I have no idea why young people think 30+ is a grandpa or something.

Edge of David

18 Dec 2025 — 7 min read

I'm now solidly in my 40's and I can say without a doubt that 28-38 is a man's prime. 38 being the peak.

I'm writing this because I randomly commented on Greg O'Gallagher's IG post and I now get a few messages each week from either supportive men or young girls and guys calling me a "delulu" middle aged man.

It's quite annoying because it's the total opposite of delulu. It was my lived experience. I got WAY more attention from young women in my 30s than I ever did in my 20's and it's not even close. Even now in my 40s with my gf being in her 20's I can be honest with myself that 40's are still good, but 30's are your peak.

I did mention this a bit previously in my life advice for young men post:

...and here as well for how to set yourself up for success in your 30s you can checkout:

So let me cover a few essential "need to know info" for young men (and any random girls that find this) who think 30+ is some fat balding, old man with low T on medication for back pain.

No, there is no written rule that you must be fat and bald once you're over 30

Alright, I get that the baldness thing is not something you can control, and I'm quite lucky that I've had zero balding. Not even a receding hairline. But being out of shape? That's on you.

It's embarrassing for men in their 30s to think they're "over the hill" and just give up and let themselves go. Physical, financial, psychological, you should be the best version of yourself you've ever been, and there is zero reason not to have an athletic, healthy physique you're proud of.

Your testosterone does starts to decline 1% a year or so after 30, while your metabolic rate stays the same. So this is just a stupid notion that muscle mass, energy levels, and testosterone fall off a cliff.

You're better looking in your 30s generally speaking

Hey guess what? Girls like older men. Not grandpa, just grown men who have it together (which is becoming more rare). Look, I get it. I was in my 20s once too and remember thinking that 37-38+ was old.

But it's not old for men. Once you hit your late 20's and early 30's your look should come into focus. The baby face gone, a bit more rugged and physically strong.

Most men generally look better with a little age to them.

Not all men obviously, some guys peak in their 20s and fall apart as they age, but for most guys if they do the work (cliche but it's why everyone says this) you should grow into a competent, put together man.

It's not even about looks too

You've been dealing with women for 10-15 years at this point. You should have your life together and a masculine frame (that means enforcing boundaries and leading the relationship) that women will simply find attractive.

Girls are complex and are attracted to a multitude of things in a man, not just looks (looks only matter 100% on dating apps). There are men on the internet who are too cognitively inept to understand that women are, in fact, attracted to humor, wit, verbal creativity, and don't enjoy spending time with boring men.

These men then turn around and will say dumb shit like "it's not my job to entertain a woman or mention something about pandering or simping for women.

If we're talking about a first date, then sure, it's not your job to wow or entertain a woman, and if a girl expects that, she's just not that into you (the goal of a first date is to meet and see if they're is any chemistry).

But if she does have that initial attraction, it's your job to keep her interest, and you don't do that by being boring. This demonstrates to me exactly why some men don't attract women. They don't even comprehend the sexual selection tendencies in women and get upset at women for being women, or guys like me who are the messengers.

By your 30s, you should really understand and get women, which makes dating more fun and easy, which is why girls like older guys. They're innately attracted to men a bit older than them and your fame and charm should be well developed by now.

A man's 40s are like a woman's 30s

The whole "men age like fine wine" thing is true only for only a minority of middle aged men who take care of themselves.

I just want to emphasize to younger guys that men have more time (10 years or so) than women but not forever. In your 30s is when you should start focusing on family formation if you're blessed to meet a girl who you can build with (and that's also what you want, if being a bachelor is what you prefer then just ignore this).

While you can still get attention from young women in your 40s, let's be honest, it's not optimal. You have a kid at 45, that means you'll be 65 with a 20 year old.

Also, there are phases of life and don't resist moving into the next one. It's like when you graduate high school, you're so ready to not be in high school. You're looking forward to that next thing.

That's how life is, you have periods of transition and periods of predictable stability. But imagine fighting that transition.

Imagine you're 19 still hanging out with high schoolers and not moving on to that next thing. It's weird. That's what happens to both men and women when they don't move into that next phase in life. In part because the current phase is so fun, it feels like the party will never end.

A man's 30s are a woman's 20s

At some point you do age out, the lights come on at the club proverbially. The issue is that a man's 30s are like a woman's 20's You're finally making money, you're finally getting attention from girls you're actually attracted to, the world opens up to you in ways it did not when you were a useless 20 something man.

You don't want to settle down, you want to enjoy your optionality you had to work for in a similar way a 20 year old girl does (who didn't have to work for it). But just like that 20 year old girl, you're not in you're 30s forever. There are phases to life and don't be afraid of moving from one phase to the next. That is, picking a girl and building a family and giving up the bachelor, playboy lifestyle.

Sow your oats, party it up, have fun, but don't make your life a myopic focus on hedonistic pursuits. You should have more important things to do long term.